Thursday, February 21, 2013

It Was An Accident...

Why do we "accident" ourselves into disaster?  We are so far removed from personal responsibility that we don't even see when we are at fault.  Everything we see, say, and do is one big OOPS. Oops, I know I am dieting but my husband just purchased a large pizza and I ate 1/2 of it. Oops, I just accidentally had sex with someone that wasn't my spouse.  Oops, I just accidentally shot my girlfriend numerous times, but judge, I thought she was a burglar, hiding in the bathroom screaming. It was all an accident. How old are we, 5?  No, we are grown people living in a world that allows us to be irresponsible. My 3 year old knows the difference between an accident---pottying in his pants at nap time---and intentional behavior---standing outside, buck-naked, peeing in the yard.  Big difference.

The problem is that everyone thinks that everyone else is the culprit but we don't want to admit we are just as irresponsible as our friend, neighbor or the guy we pass on the street. Truth? The truth is that we cry, 'it was an accident' only when we get caught in the act of wrong-doing.  Case in point, the other day my son got busted out by his sister---he finger painted his room with a mix of Ovaltene, chocolate drink mix and water....well it looks like poo, although it was not because The Princess would certainly have taken greater pleasure in announcing the finger paint job if her baby brother had used poo. At any rate, what was an intentional act (because that boy knew good and well what he was doing was wrong) turned out to be an accident when he was confronted---oh mommy mommy I so sawry, it was a assident (in the his best 3yr old voice). Isn't it funny that, as adults, we still operate like that.

My accidental, late night, food binges have been the catalyst to my overweight disaster (along with those blasted mint m&ms). Tiger Woods' plethora of affairs was the disaster to his failed marriage and tarnished career. Mr. Olympian Blade Runner, Oscar Pistorius' rage was his disaster, as it resulted in him killing his girlfriend. And let's not forget the chick, Jodi Arias, who stabbed her boyfriend 27 times, and says it was an accident....she doesn't remember any of it or parts of it or the past is jumbled up with the present...yada yada yada. Come on! We have all arrived at our disasters, in great part, by our own doing. Man up. Woman Up. You are NOT 300 lbs on accident---never (well, maybe if you are Fat Man from the Austin Powers movie, I guess telling grown folk to 'get in my belly' can put the weight on quickly, especially if you miscalculated the fat/calorie content--- and yes, I know that wasn't his name, hush).  The fact of the matter is, the devil did not make you do it and there are no green monsters hiding under your bed. We all need to decide that we are going to be responsible for our own actions. In the spirit of Lent, regardless if you are religious or not, let us all give up irresponsibility.  Being responsible has no age limit, big or small, we all have it in us to know, understand, and accept right from wrong.

Let me start, I am responsible for my body, my finances, my beautiful children, my madness (actually my husband and children have a hand in that), my words and my well-being. No one else can make me or break me, other than God Almighty. Now, your turn.

Until next time,
Be good to yourself and a blessing to  others.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Butt-Whoopin Angel

Do you ever get tired of the shear stupidity of people? I mean, come on, when did it become okay to just be downright inconsiderate, backbiting, and ignorant?  Somewhere along the way our society has allowed us to be a nation of careless, non empathetic people. These characteristics are now the social norm. We used to be a people who watched out for each other, who took care of each other's children...we were a village. Now we are a bunch of punks...looking out for numero uno, not wanting to get involved even if what we are witnessing is wrong.

For example, I know that riding a school bus is an experience, and a, somewhat, difficult challenge for kids. I rode the bus as a child and let me tell you, it was miserable. I was, at times, made fun of, because I was overweight. I was bullied but not to the degree of torment. Not that ANY level of bullying is ever alright, because it is totally unacceptable, however, I hear about what children go through today and I want to go into attack mode. I saw, on either t.v. or some other social network, where this mentally challenged young girl was being bullied by not only another child on the bus but his ignorant parent once they got off the bus. REALLY? First of all, why didn't the bus driver put a stop to it.  I know I am not a bus driver, and would likely be arrested if I ever were,  but it would seem like humanity would trump all other aspects of that job.  I have 5 kids, you can ask each of them, down to the 3 year old, "has mommy ever stopped the car to yell at you"...the 3 oldest may state that there was more than yelling involved, maybe something about spanking their butts and not being able to sit on them afterwards. But as a  bus driver, yeah, I am pulling that bus over and I am going a little 'crazy momma' on them. That may have nipped some of that mess in the bud.

Or how about those stupid people who think that just because they are "keeping it real" that gives them a license to say whatever comes to mind. For real, don't nobody want to hear every word that pops into another's head, especially when it is rude, disrespectful, and poisonous to another's self worth. For instance, take that dumb show 'Dance Moms' (I think that's what it's called), the owner/instructor is this overbearing, loud, and incredibly rude woman who believes that God put her on the earth to share every despicable thought she has in her head. She spews ugliness to not only the mothers on the show but to the young dancers that are working their tails off to win her medals for her studio. Insane! I'm not certain who is worse, the obnoxious woman who owns the place or the mommas who allow their daughter's and themselves to endure this woman's crude behavior.

That's why I think God needs to implement a Butt-Whoopin Angel. Lord, if you are listening, please make sure this angel is built like a gladiator and has the no-nonsense attitude of Madea (for you who don't know you need to ask somebody). Yep! That angel's duty is to come to earth and open a can of whoop @#% (sorry, there really is no other way to say that phrase) on all those folks who have lost their ever-lovin minds. You want to bully someone, you get a smack down. You want to stay out until ungodly hours of the morning and have your momma worrying because you are 18 and think you are grown....you get a whoopin! You cheat on your spouse, whoopin! You yell at your momma and call her names....WHOOPIN.  And I don't mean a little tap on the butt, get your feelings hurt kind of spankin either. No-sir-ree-bob. I mean the kind of whoopin that has you crying and snottin,  mumbling...I'm sorry, I won't do it again...you know the kind of pleading I'm talking about (if you got a butt spankin as a child),  the I'm sorry I won't do it again followed by the parent's "this hurts me more than it hurts you" kind of whoopin.

A holy ghost smack down is what needs to begin to happen in our nation! That's what I should start praying for, "dear Lord, will you please send the Butt-Whoopin Angel down to spank my child, husband, neighbor, friend, co-worker".....Ya'all better watch out, I am switchin my prayers up because some of you need a good old fashioned butt whoopin and the Lord just might be listening and send that angel your way. Ain't no whoopin like a holy ghost whoopin cause a holy ghost whoopin don't stop!

Until next time
Be good to yourself and a blessing to others